Tips for those currently trying to conceive (TTC) and dealing with an announcement of the birth of a baby.
The temptation when you have been trying for a baby and not getting anywhere and it seems ALL your friends are having babies is a challenge. It is hard to keep positive.
You may experience some horrible thoughts. It’s okay. I recall thinking drug addicts seem to pump out baby after baby, year in, year out, and I haven’t even sniffed a glass of wine or taken a paracetamol for over a year and still we can’t conceive.
The green eyed monster may surface and jealousy can get the better of you. I found it helped to avoid the brand new babies until they were a little older. I would drop things off to them and leave it at the door rather than go in and have to feel the surge of emotion when looking at or having to hold a new born baby.
Firstly remember these reactions are perfectly normal. It is the uncertainty and feelings of loss. Having someone you can share your thoughts and emotions with i.e a close friend who knows you are trying to conceive definitely helps.
Give yourself permission to be jealous and angry. It’s okay, you are human.
When you hear about the latest piece of “good news” it’s time to get serious about some dedicated personal self care: Book a massage, a restorative yoga class, listen to a positive meditation, make a list of positive affirmations, pat a dog, do something unexpected for someone you love, have a soak in a lovely bath in epsom salts.
This is the time to bring your self compassion to the forefront of your mind- make a list of your own accomplishments, check how you are relating to this news and reframe your critical voice, use self soothing words “ It is understandable you are feeling stressed and anxious, this is natural, it’s going to be okay”, take time out to really meet your own needs right now.